Perspectives – Surrounding Myself With Wise Counsel

I love reading books and listening to podcasts on personal growth.  After the birth of my oldest daughter I would walk around our neighborhood just listening to different  speakers teaching on various topics including marriage, parenting, finances, and personal growth.  Each speaker shared from a perspective of experience and proven success.  The authority in which they taught was credible and reliable.  I’ll never forget one teaching I heard regarding “wise counsel” and why it was so important to surround myself with a team of people to help me navigate through tough decisions or life choices which would impact not only myself but my family.

For instance, the President of the United States has a team of people he depends on for wise counsel.  CEO’s across the country typically have similar types of teams to help make decisions to grow companies.  I lean on trusted people to provide me feedback and perspective for issues I’m dealing with or opportunities I’m presented with.  Sometimes it is far too easy for me to make decisions based on emotions and feelings which later I might regret no matter how good or bad the opportunity may be.  What I’ve learned is this -surrounding myself with wise counsel is a valuable key to successful living.  And when I say “successful” I’m not referring to money, the size of your house, or the type of job you have.  A successful life to me is living a life full of joy, hope, love, and purpose.

Recently I was upset with something someone had said to me.  In that situation I had three people I admire and trust very much share their perspectives on the matter.  Each one provided insight and advice on how to overcome the situation. I trusted their advice and opinions because they spoke from a place of authority having already experienced similar types of challenges.  Had I handled it the way I wanted to I probably would be dealing with consequences from my behavior because I would have been reacting out of frustration.  Their advice saved me from letting adversity rob me of my peace.  Instead, I just let it all go and moved on.  I haven’t thought about it since and, better yet, my peace is still intact.

I can’t tell you how many times wise friends and family have saved me from making bad decisions and encouraged me to take chances on great opportunities.  Ultimately I am the one who makes the final decision on any given matter, but having a team of wise friends really helps make decisions with clarity and rational.  Often it is so hard to see situations beyond my own perspective but having wise counsel certainly has helped me to see the bigger picture.  And in the end, its the bigger picture I’m after.

Here are a few tips from my own experience on what to look for when seeking wise people to counsel you.

• Are they trustworthy? - Trust is key.. no trust = no counsel.
• What type of life do “wise” people live on a day to day basis.  Are they people of integrity? Do you see them also making wise decisions about their own life? – If you see people making poor decisions in their own life, why would you want them to give you advice for your own?
• Are they looking out for your best interest or are they looking out for their own best interest when making decisions? -Sometimes people will give you advice because it is in their own best interests.  It is best to discern with others in these types of situations.
• In general, are they “half empty” or “half full” type of people.  -Pessimistic people can sometimes give a much needed perspective on reality, in general I find pessimistic people living a life of limitations and do not include them within my team of counsel.
• Can they see beyond present circumstances and offer insight about how situations can impact you in the future?  - I always appreciate the insights of people like this.

What types of people do you allow to give you counsel?

Tagged as: life journey, personal growth